We all have them; haters.
Before I go into how to deal with haters, please understand that if you’re someone who has the courage to speak your mind or you’ve had a glimpse of success on your way to the top…you already know what I mean.
And you probably know you can either get bummed down because some random dude is trolling the internet because they don’t have a life or you can laugh it off and carry on with your own.
But here’s my $0.02 on dealing with these bastards.
How to deal with haters…
Step 1: Ask
Ask yourself if what this person is saying is valid. Are they an expert in your field? Are they an authority on your life or your business? Is their input valuable in any way? Probably not.
Step 2: React
In the rare event that their input DOES make you aware of something you could improve upon, do it. Do something to correct it. If there’s nothing you can do, want to do or should do, then skip this step. Besides… constructive criticism, with even an ounce of value, will never arrive in the form of blatant public disrespect.
Step 3: Forget
Who is this person that’s giving you shit? What’s their name? You have no idea? Exactly. They’re a nobody to you. Move on.
Now, I know it’s not that easy.
So let’s better understand why you’re dealing with haters in your life. There must be some reasoning behind why this little negative fucker is taking the time out of their busy, (or probably not-so-busy) schedule to write you a nasty email, comment on your social media, or message you with their opinions.
Why you’re dealing with haters…
1. They feel threatened.
If you’re dealing with haters, it’s because you’re doing something in your life that they feel threatened by. It could be you’re doing something outside of the “norm” and it’s awesome. It could be they’re jealous that you had the balls to be different. You’re up to your face in something pretty damn amazing, and to folks who merely shuffle their asses from one day to the next, that can be a tough pill to swallow. It is much preferable to people like that to shrink down their idea of “acceptable” to the size of their current, lackluster reality. Whatever it is, they can’t bring themselves to be happy for others who have risen above what they’ve achieved, but deep down inside they wish they had the courage to do something big. Instead, they just talk shit.
2. You’re successful.
This is the obvious answer. When anyone starts to have even the smallest glimpse of success, you’ll see “haters” come out of the woodwork, picketing their opinion as to why you suck. This is a reflection of THEM and what they want.
Sometimes this comes to you directly, and sometimes, it happens behind your back.
When it comes to you directly, it’ll often be the “keyboard courage” of a total stranger… some bored and bitter asshole just looking for someone to take their day out on. (Better you than their dog, am I right?) You can see those situations as evidence that you appear, to the average joe, to be totally killing it. And even if it shows up in some snarly rant from whateverthefuckhisnameis, that’s still pretty cool, right?
Here’s the tricky one, though- more often than not, it’ll come from people who DO know you. Maybe even trusted friends or partners. And it will almost certainly NOT come to you directly. You’ve outgrown them, and it’s obvious. These people would be TERRIFIED to hash out their inferiority complex with you, but it doesn’t change the fact that they damn sure have one. A big stanky one. And they just can’t help themselves.
You can look at THESE situations, which are likely to be surprisingly painful, as not just evidence, but FULL ON PROOF that you’re killing it like a machete assassin.
Nobody talks smack without insecurities as their motivator. Nobody. And when they know that they can’t control your growth, they will fire at will, attempting to manipulate the way others see you instead. So that some small part of them can still feel right.
Again, it’s way easier for them to just talk shit.
My final thoughts…
I would recommend a few things when dealing with haters. Call your friends and have a vent session about it over a few glasses of wine – it always feels great to talk it out….and to drink wine.
Or, simply use this to fuel your fire.
Whenever someone talks shit about me, my business skyrockets. It always does. Not only is this free advertising for me (thank you, bitches!), but real vindication is not making someone else pay for what they did to you.
Real vindication is succeeding in spite of what was said, and then not even giving a shit about what they did.
Because fuck them.
Hope this helps and congratulations on your success!
Did this help you? If so, I would greatly appreciate your feedback in the comments section below or sharing this on Facebook.
“I teach you how to create wealth and freedom in your life with a “zero fucks given” attitude!”
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